a commercial break

if you are like me, you might really despise having to shave. if i could do away with all of the hair except for what is on my head, i would most likely do it.

i have a nifty razor that i’ve managed to keep for a long time. for so long that i have bought replacement heads for it. the relationship with this razor has lasted longer than many of my previous relationships with men.

last week, i was trying to procure new refills. they were in a locked case-thing at the drugstore. the instructions were quite clear and simple. push the button that is marked PUSH. i pushed it. nothing. i pushed it a few times and it wouldn’t budge. i was getting annoyed and thinking for christ’s sake i just want my replacement cartridges! WHY does everything have to be so hard these days?

i briefly considered disposable razors since they are not under lock and key. no i thought to myself, i won’t go back to those after having this.

anyways, wtf has our world come to with needing to put womens razors under lock and key? is there some kind of razor terrorist group out there that i don’t know about b/c i don’t watch the local news?

another razor caught me eye, (argh i’m a pirate) and it was on sale and not under lock and key with some button marked push that you cannot push.

so i bought it. i was skeptical after having so many failed razors before.

i love it. in fact, i am shaving my shaving parts on a very regular basis. i shave my shaving parts with a twinkle in my eye and a song in my heart.

thanks to the new razor. THIS razor? has the soap already on it. all’s you gotta do is wet it and shave. it comes with a hanging thing for your shower/bath area.

shaving doesn’t seem like a chore. i just grab it and shave. i wonder if this is how men get to feel for their whole lives? the freedom!

**this was not a paid endorsement. this is an actual real life experience; experienced by piglet.

witches of eastwick quote

the following was found here.

in witches of eastwick jack nicholson’s character had a dialogue with cher’s character alex:
———————–

See, women are in touch with different things.
That’s my opinion. It’s not a fashionable one right now, but fuck it!
I see men running around, putting their dicks…
…into everything, trying to make something happen.
But it’s women who are the source, the only power.
Nature. Birth. Rebirth.
Cliché. Cliché.
Sure. But true.
Why are you telling me this?
You’re an honest woman. I’m being honest with you.
I like women. I admire them.
But if you want me to treat you like a dumb twit, I will.
But what for? You have brains.
More than brains. But you don’t know it. Most women don’t.
Are you married?
Good question!
You see? Brains.
The answer is no. I don’t believe in it.
Good for the man. Lousy for the woman.
She dies. She suffocates. I’ve seen it. Then the husband…
…complains to everyone that he’s fucking a dead person.
And he’s the one who killed her.
-Where is your husband? -Dead.
Sorry, but you’re one of the lucky ones.
When a woman unloads a husband or a husband unloads a woman…
…however it happens… death, desertion, divorce….
When that happens, a woman blooms. She blossoms.
Like flowers. Like fruit.
She is ripe.
That’s the woman for me.